I'm diving into three big lessons I've learned after years of working with children on the autism spectrum. Let me give you a bit of background. Before I became a naturopathic doctor, I spent many years as a behavior therapist, working hands-on with kids with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). That experience has shaped so much of how I view care, support, and growth for these amazing kids and their families.
A Quick Intro: Why These Lessons Matter
Before diving into the specifics, I want to set the stage. Autism Spectrum Disorder is complex—there’s no one-size-fits-all approach. Over many years in this field, I've seen treatments that help, strategies that uplift, and the simple power of patience and understanding. Sharing these three lessons isn't just about my experience; it's about helping everyone better understand and support children and families facing ASD.
If you’re new to this journey or just want practical advice, these takeaways are for you.
Takeaway 1: Assess and Address the Big Picture
What Influences Behavior?
One of the first things I realized while working as both a behavior therapist and naturopathic doctor is that challenging behaviors can't be changed in isolation. They're often a sign that something else is off—that something deeper needs attention.
"Maladaptive or bad behavior cannot be completely changed if the big picture is not assessed and addressed."
What does the big picture mean? Instead of focusing only on what a child is doing, look at why they're doing it.
Key Areas to Check
Children's behaviors—good or bad—can be shaped by many things. Here are a few areas that I've found critical to assess:
Sleep Habits: Is the child getting enough rest? Sleep issues are common and can make daytime behavior tough to manage.
Environment: Physical surroundings, sensory input (light, sound, scent), and routines matter. Sometimes a simple change—dimming lights, reducing noise—can make a big difference.
Exposure: Think allergens, chemicals, even screen time. What’s in their world that might be impacting them?
Diet: What are they eating and drinking? Food sensitivities or nutritional gaps often show up as behavioral challenges.
Daily Routines: Sudden changes or lack of structure can throw kids off balance. Predictable routines help many children feel safe.
Takeaway 2: Families Need Support, Too
This is a big one—something that can get overlooked as everyone’s attention centers on the child with autism. I've learned that it’s not just the kids who need support; it’s their families, too. Parents, siblings, caregivers—they’re all on this journey together.
"Families…often need just as much support as the child. So what can we do to help support them? Give or share as many resources that we can think of that might be helpful for them that could be there. Give them some beneficial support."
Siblings, Parents, Caregivers—It’s All Connected
Raising kids isn’t easy, let's be real. Throw in the unique challenges of ASD, and every single member of the family can feel overwhelmed at times. Siblings might feel ignored. Parents stretch themselves thin. Caregivers can burn out.
As people supporting a child with ASD, our job isn’t just to focus on the child. The whole family system needs care and grace.
Three Ways to Support ASD Families
Share Helpful Resources
Whether it’s books, local groups, podcasts, or online support hubs, don’t keep good info to yourself. A simple recommendation can be life-changing.
Ask Directly: 'What can I help you with?'
Sometimes the best way to support someone is just to ask. Don’t guess what they need—let them tell you.
Extend Grace
Being compassionate goes a long way. Every family is doing the best they can in challenging circumstances. No judgment, just understanding.
"It's difficult enough raising children in this world. So raising special needs children can be quite a feat. Sometimes it can be quite challenging, and sometimes it can be even more taxing. But, as we know, parenting is a journey, health is a journey. There will be bumps along the way."
Takeaway 3: Kids Are Brilliant, Not Broken
This lesson deserves its own spotlight. Working with kids on the spectrum, I’ve witnessed incredible intelligence, creativity, and unique perspectives. But many times, these kids are misunderstood simply because they communicate or express emotion differently.
"Children with Autism Spectrum disorder and actually with other developmental disorders as well, they are absolutely brilliant. But unfortunately they are frequently misunderstood…that does not and should not mean that they are incapable of feeling, because that couldn’t be further from the truth."
Misunderstood Brilliance
It’s easy for outsiders to miss what’s happening with kids who don’t communicate the same way as their peers. But trust me, their minds are working hard—often in ways that aren’t immediately obvious.
Some children might not speak much, but love numbers. Others may avoid eye contact but have wild imagination and amazing memory. Each child is different.
Communication and Connection
Maybe you don’t know much about autism, or haven’t met someone on the spectrum. That’s okay—everyone starts somewhere. The key is to learn, not judge.
Please remember:
Never mock or belittle someone with special needs. It’s harmful and wrong. Instead, use every chance to learn and connect.
"If you're not familiar with autism or you don't know anybody with autism, you can learn. You can educate yourself about Autism Spectrum disorder, but never ever do you want to mock an individual with special needs or others. That is a big no. No. We all have the capacity to learn and I want to make sure these kids are viewed in a more constructive and holistic way."
Celebrate Strengths
There’s power in positive focus. One of the most important parts of helping an ASD child thrive is celebrating what makes them awesome.
Here’s how:
Spot their strengths:
Are they creative? Good at puzzles? Musical?
Celebrate those skills.
Build on what’s strong:
Use their strengths to teach and grow—maybe through games, art, or tech.
Support the weaknesses without judgment:
We all have areas that need work. Support is about steady encouragement.
"Celebrate the strengths and help them to work on their weaknesses again. We all want to grow, we want to get better. We want these kids to heal. So let's use what they have to their advantage and work on supporting what needs to be supported in the meantime."
Final Thoughts: Growth is a Journey
Supporting children on the autism spectrum isn’t about finding a quick fix. It’s about understanding the big picture, caring for their families, and celebrating the unique strengths each child brings. Parenting is a journey—sometimes smooth, sometimes full of bumps. The key is to approach every step with compassion and an open mind.
If you take away just one thing, let it be this:
Every child is brilliant in their own way, and with support, patience, and love, we can help them shine even brighter.
"Let's all work together to make the transition to optimal health for these kids as smooth as possible."
Q&A: Your Questions Matter
This isn’t just a one-way conversation. If you have questions, stories, or worries—drop them in the comments or reach out directly. I truly want to hear what your experience has been.
If you want more info, need advice, or want to discuss working together, I’m happy to connect.
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